My life is consumed with worry. Finances, children, work, schedules, health, etc., etc. It is probably my worst character trait. I hate it because inevitably I worry about things not in my control, things that will work themselves out, things that I don't need to waste my time on. I know it's a lack of faith. A lack of trusting. But I still worry.
I can read something as simple as someone's status on Facebook and can be wrought with anxiety in a matter of seconds. At 31, I know when my stomach is in knots, that something has triggered my anxiety. And I can usually rethink my last few minutes or hours to determine what has me feeling so anxious.
Unfortunately, it's not that easy for a five year old. She can't even put into words how badly her tummy hurts. Not to mention to express why it might hurt. At five years old, my little Leighton is already a worrier. It literally breaks my heart to think about her living life worrying so much. Right now, something is causing her nervous system to be out of whack, which in turn just makes me a nervous wreck!
And what do I do?? Contribute to the stress by asking Leighton every few minutes how her stomach is. Are you feeling okay? Do you need to go to the bathroom? Do you need a snack? How is your belly now? No wonder she worries!!!
So, today I am not going to think on the "what if's" and worry more. I am not going to ask her every few minutes how she is feeling. I am not going to obsess over what might be causing her so much anxiety. I am going to live today to the fullest. I am going to love on Leighton. I am going to provide her with as much attention as she needs. I am going to give her the confidence she requires. I am going to wrap my arms around her and provide her the stability she yearns.
And I am going to trust, and pray, that everything will work out, that nothing is physically wrong with Leighton, and that she will forget why she was even nervous in the first place.
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